Month: November 2020

5K Number Two

On By LeraIn Life, running1 Comment

I woke up in the dark, feeling wide awake. Knowing I had a race in a few hours made it impossible for me to sleep any longer, even though I had only slept five and a half hours. I could already feel the nerves kicking in as I got out of bed and changed into the clothes I had laid out the night before. I had my usual breakfast of overnight oats made with milk and chia seeds, and began doing some stretching. I had only run twice in the week leading up to the race in an attempt to keep some of my hip flexor tendinitis at bay, and it kind of helped. That said, I was still feeling pain and my hip was stiff. I got it loosened up the best I could while listening to some music to psych me up for the event. Finally it was time to leave. I donned my jacket, quickly ate a banana, and walked out the door.

The weather that day was less than ideal. I had been expecting 40 degrees and rain, according to the forecast I checked before I went to bed, but instead it decided to be a few degrees cooler and snow. I very carefully made the drive to the orchard where the race was being held. The roads were slushy and I knew during the drive that this run was going to be challenging. I was surprised just how much snow was sticking since it had just been unseasonably warm two days prior. I pulled into the parking lot and, as luck would have it, I opened the car door and stepped into a puddle. I could already feel cold water in my shoe, a feeling I’d need to get used to anyway in those conditions, so I didn’t worry too much about it. Luckily there was a tent set up for registration, so I stood under there to keep dry and talked to a few people while we waited for the race to start.

Finally it was 9:55 and time to make my way to the starting line. I felt ready. I had been able to consistently run 2 miles in the 2 weeks leading up to the race, so I was feeling confident that I cold run most, if not maybe all, of this race, especially since most of it was on the road. The race organizer counted us down and yelled “Go!”, and I took off. The first few minutes were in the orchard itself on a gravel access road, but it was snow covered and had potholes, so it was a little hard to navigate and I could already feel pain from the uneven terrain. I just kept telling myself that I just had to make it to the road and I’d do better. I’m used to running on the road and I have less pain doing that.

Unfortunately, it just didn’t turn out to be my day. I was hurting even running on the road, and the cold air was making my asthma flare up and I could feel my lungs burn as my feet pounded the slushy road and snow swirled all around me. I ended up slowing to a walk for a few minutes before I ran again, and I spent the whole race alternating back and forth between the two. I tried my best to clear my head and not feel discouraged when everyone else passed me. I was freezing, my feet were going numb, but no way was I going to turn around and go back. I slowly made my way back to the orchard. Partway down the completely snow-covered access road, two runners who had already finished and who I hadn’t met before were making their way toward me. They asked if they could run back with me and I told them that was fine. I appreciated the company and they distracted me on the way back. As I made the final turn to the finish line, half a dozen people were still out there cheering me on while I approached. I was so grateful to have all that support. The fact that they stood out in the freezing cold, wet weather and waited for me meant the world. Most of them finished at least 15-20 minutes before I did. I grabbed my medal and we all went inside to get hot cider and victory donuts. We chatted a while and celebrated finishing the race. Most of the group was new to running this year, so I was in great company.

I wish I had done better, but I’m still not able to shine in races. I get so discouraged seeing everyone go out in front of me. Even though I expected it before the race even started, I guess in the end I wasn’t able to overcome that feeling. I didn’t want to race to beat anyone. My only goal was to do better than I did in my first race, and sadly I didn’t meet that goal. I was a few minutes slower. I know there were factors out of my control, but I had been expecting to do so much better. I’m still glad I showed up because one day I’ll learn how to do as good in races as I do in training. It was only my second race, so i have a long way to go.

Feeling Like Giving Up

On By LeraIn Cycling, Life, running1 Comment

I had my followup appointment today for my hip tendinitis and I’ve been crying off and on all day. I’m so beyond frustrated with my orthopedic doctor. It was a huge waste of my time (and money). Both of my hips have been bothering me, but in different places. On the left side it’s my gluteus medius tendon and on the right it’s my hip flexors. My left side has been feeling better; it’s not perfect, but the pain is less most days. My right side has been unchanged. I figured my doctor might want to discuss how some of the things I’ve been trying at physical therapy have been helping, especially the temporary shoe lift on my right foot. I was curious to see what he’d have to say about it and if he thinks it might be a solution to getting all of my trouble areas to heal up and leave me be.

He had no interest in any of that. He seemed almost offended that I went to my PT for help while I waited for my follow-up appointment and questioned how badly I was actually hurting. He told me I can’t just go to PT forever. I wouldn’t call a couple of sessions after 6 weeks working on a home program “forever”. All the doctor told me was that I should get a home program from my PT and work hard at it and everything would go away, never mind the fact that I’ve been doing that exact thing. I do my PT exercises every day, and on days where I’m hurting really badly, I stretch extra. He also told me to join a gym, lose weight, and work on diet and my pain would go away. I had to remind him that I’ve already lost a lot of weight (nearly 70 pounds), and that the hip issues started when I became a runner. The left side has been bothering me for 13 months and the right side for about 5 months. I really wanted to know what my doctor thought about my leg length discrepancy, and I didn’t even get a chance to ask him because he made me cry right there in his office. I agree with my PT about my leg length discrepancy being the cause, but it’s not a simple thing to just fix. Left untreated, my body develops poor compensatory patterns, which is why I have so many other areas that are hurting, which lately has been my right knee. Even treating a leg length discrepancy can cause problems while the body adjusts to its new mechanics if it’s treated too aggressively too quickly. I don’t know why my doctor didn’t want to talk about any of that stuff. Maybe he didn’t even read the chart. He sure didn’t seem to remember I was a runner until I told him I had a 5k this weekend I needed to get through, and his only response to that was that he was glad to hear it because it would help with the weight loss. It was at that point I started to cry. His last piece of brilliant advice was to tell me to call up the office and make an appointment if it didn’t get any better. I don’t understand how much “not better” it needs to be for him to care, but I’m certainly not going back.

I really don’t understand what happened today. My doctor was great about getting my left hip feeling better. Why is it different because it’s the right side that’s still bothering me? In the meantime, there’s not a lot I can do. My PT has been wonderful at helping me look for solutions, so I’m grateful I at least have someone who is interested in helping me. Him not being a physician limits that help, but it’s still been a blessing. He recommended I make the shoe modification permanent and told me of a place that should be able to do that for me in the next city over. The only reservation I have is if it removes the support aspect of my motion control shoes, and my PT wasn’t sure, so I’ll have a few questions I want to ask. In the meantime, the temporary ones are helping for now. I don’t know how much that will cost to modify my shoes, but if it will give me a chance at a pain-free life, I’ll try it if the price is reasonable enough. In the meantime, I’ll be taking a couple of weeks off from running after my 5k. I’ll also be taking a few weeks off from PT to work on a home strengthening program while I’m not running and see where that gets me.

I try incredibly hard to be positive and optimistic, but I’m struggling with that right now. I’ve been doing pretty well with my running considering all these injuries, and now with my asthma and the cold air for the winter season. It’s hard to see success on paper in my training journal and still feel like I’m somehow failing. The numbers may look good, but the way my body feels tells a different story.

Pre-race Update

On By LeraIn Life, runningLeave a comment

It’s been a week and a half since I’ve been trying those temporary lifts in my right shoe that my physical therapist made me. Overall, I think they’ve been helping. I still have a lot of pain, but it feels easier to walk. I’ve had a leg length discrepancy my whole life, so I’ve always been used to how it feels. Using a heel lift again back in March helped, but it didn’t fully correct it. The new shoe inserts put me up to where my legs feel very close to even. I didn’t even know how good it could feel to walk. The hope is still that it will eventually help my other injuries go away and stay away by removing the extra strain on my muscles and tendons. My only concern is that my right knee has been trying to bother me lately. It does sometimes, so I don’t know if it’s just one of its occasional flare-ups or if it’s because of the lifts. I mentioned it to my PT and he wasn’t too concerned, so I’m just keeping an eye on it for now.

My running has been going pretty well. I’m able to run 25 minutes straight through with no walk breaks now! I’ve never been able to do that much. I’m still very slow, around a 14 minute mile, but it’s a start. Another month or two and that will be improved. I’m hoping to be able to run 30 minutes by my last 2 runs before the 5k in 13 days, and then on race day i’ll be trying my hardest to run all of it straight through. I’m really glad I’m back in PT and working on loosening up my muscles and building some strength. I’ve only been going once a week and doing a lot of stuff at home, but I’m still finding it helpful. If I can get both of my SI joints moving the right way, that should also help. They’re both still stuck, but in different directions, because my body apparently can’t do anything normal xD

Trying Something New

On By LeraIn Life, runningLeave a comment

Last week I reached my limit with my ongoing injuries and pain and called up the physical therapy clinic. I spoke with my PT on the phone about what was going on, and he had me come in so he could do an assessment since it had been about 7 weeks since I was there last. He spent a lot of time looking at everything and started formulating a plan to treat my stuck SI joint and deal with my uneven legs, which he thinks may end up helping. He was careful to say it was his best guess, which I totally understand. I know it isn’t a certainty, but I’m grateful he’s willing to try. I went back a couple days later so we could get to work on treating the problems.

Friday when I was at PT, I was the only patient there because the other one had cancelled. My PT did another assessment and the other therapist that was there was fascinated. The difference between my left and right hip height is very drastic, and he found it really interesting (his exact words were, “WOW! No way!”). The two of them brainstormed together about what might help. Eventually after testing me with different heights under my right foot, my PT made me something temporary to try in my right shoe to make my legs and pelvis even. If my body responds well to it, I’ll have to get my right shoe built up to that height, and if my body doesn’t like it, it’s back to the drawing board. It’s too early to know for sure, but I had a little less pain running this morning. I occasionally have low pain running days, so I don’t know if it was the lifts or just a coincidence. I’m planning to run again Thursday before my appointment so I can at least have two runs worth of info to give my PT.

I’m hoping eventually I can do a lot more trail running. I discussed it at PT and at the moment it’s best not to do it very often because, as my PT put it, my “body would be a mess if I ran trails”. I don’t really mind running on the road because my body likes it more, but my soul likes the forest runs more. Being surrounded by nature on a run is incredibly refreshing.

I also did something new that was fun last week and volunteered for the local Zombie Run. I wanted to run it because there were people dressed like zombies hiding in the woods scaring the runners and it sounded like a lot of fun, but I didn’t want to push myself too much and make anything worse. It was fun seeing race day behind the scenes, though, even though it was freezing that evening. I still felt like I was able to participate in some of the fun. I got to run the registration table and check the runners and volunteer zombies in and out and make sure everyone signed a waiver. We also had 6 extra runners that signed up on race day, so I had to collect payments, too. I enjoyed getting to greet everyone and meet some new people in the process. The next time I’m not running a race that’s being held, I’ll volunteer again. It was a great experience!